A common question from couples who have decided to take their first forays into the hotwife lifestyle is, in effect, “where are we going to do it?”. It’s an important question with an answer that’s not always as simple and straightforward as you might think.

It’s a little amusing at times, because it always turns out the fantasy has never really developed beyond the “watching my wife in bed” stage for most men. Exactly where that bed is doesn’t really enter into the equation, but it’s important because men and women often have very different views on the sexual adventure ahead.

There are 3 places you should consider exploring your hotwife fantasy. Here are some of the common answers to this question, along with the pros and cons of each.

1. Your own bed.

This is the most obvious one and, if truth be told, it seems to be where most couples gravitate eventually, with the wife bringing her lover home and making love to him in the marital bed either with the husband present or not. The advantages are obvious: it’s easy, has minimal arrangements necessary, and you feel like you’re on home ground, which can add to comfortability.

The potential problem, though, is many women feel a deep emotional attachment to the marital bed, and may be very uncomfortable at having a man who’s not her husband in it. See my other articles for how unwanted emotions can creep in when you’re hotwifing, and how to deal with them.

2. In your wife’s lover’s bed

This is another fairly obvious answer and while it might be easier on the woman, it’s often harder on the man, especially if he’s not present. One of the things about hotwifing is the husband often has the desire, almost a need, really, to watch his wife in action. While this can present difficulties all on its own, you’ll often find her new lover is not comfortable having another man in his bedroom — especially when it’s his lover’s husband!

And, of course, there’s also the fact many husbands, for all sorts of good reasons, don’t feel right with their wives being alone in another man’s house. This isn’t necessarily just about the sex they’re having, either — there’s the whole safety issue, whether it’s actually rational or not.

3. In a hotel room

This is perhaps the best choice of all, especially for couples who are new to the hotwife lifestyle. The advantage of getting a hotel room is everyone is on neutral ground. Even if you don’t plan on  staying the night, you can wait for your partner by the bar. It gives you both that feeling of safety and security because you’re close enough to be supportive, but far enough away not to be a pest. Just make sure your wife’s lover books and pays for the room in his own name (with ID, too) even if she then reimburses him.

The biggest disadvantage of course would be the costs. If you choose to move forward, you can split the cost between couples and play partner. Or, another option is getting two rooms (so your wife can come back to your bed when she’s finished with her lover), you’d each pay for your own.

If you have a hotwifing fantasy or are curious about the alternative lifestyle, visit SLS and find a play partner.

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