Main Menu

Considering Swinging? Explore Commonly Asked Questions for Newbies

Entering into the world of swinging certainly brings about a number of questions that curious couples want to know. Because communication is key—especially for lifestyle newbies—we’ve compiled some of the most common questions asked by those considering the swinger scene.

Q: How do vanilla couples first bring up the conversation about being swingers?

A: In general, those who ultimately become swinger couples have had an interest in exploring the scene before the conversation even begins. However, one partner tends to bring up the topic in a loving and honest way. If both parties are on board, let the good times begin!

Q: How do new lifestyle couples find other swingers?

A: There are many swinger websites dedicated to connecting potential playmates. Some people attend parties, events or swingers cruises or bars to meet like-minded lifestyle couples.

Q: At swinging parties, will I most often see the same people or new faces?

A: Most swingers environments tend to have a mix of newcomers and familiar faces, so the selection of partners remains broad for those looking to keep things interesting. Test out a few places and events to see what suits your fancy the most.

Q: Is there any usually jealousy at swingers parties and events?

A: While most lifestyle couples have a strong relationship and set boundaries concerning behavior related to swinging activities, jealousy can rear its head every once and awhile at gatherings with unfamiliar possible playmates.

Usually, when the green-eyed monster makes its presence known, it is caused by insecurity and should be discussed by the partners experiencing jealousy. The best way to handle this reaction is to cease participation in such engagements to prevent the situation from becoming explosive and have that talk ASAP.

Q: How often do swingers ‘play’ versus being intimate with their primary partner?

A: Honestly, this can vary from couple to couple. Some only dabble with others on occasion, while others may participate much more. Long-time swingers claim that there are ‘on’ months and ‘off’ months. Most importantly, couples need to set their own rules about frequency of playtime with others to find out what works best for their relationship and time availability.

Q: What is the sex life of most swinger couples with their primary partner?

A: Most swinger couples have what is considered a routinely ‘normal’ sex life when they’re not engaging at parties or meeting with others in the lifestyle. Many keep their relationships strong and trusting with special weekly ‘dates’ just between themselves to keep the fire burning at home, as well.

Use Resources to Get More Information for Newbies

In closing, there are plenty of resources that can answer all of your questions about swinger couples and what to expect. Books, podcasts, and online blogs are excellent places to discover information before moving into swinging.

Why Swinging Works


Tonight’s the big night. You and your spouse are dressed to the nines. You’ve got your location picked and maybe even a nice bottle of bubbly on hand to set the mood. Yes, tonight’s the night you and your spouse…

Top 3 Reasons Why Swinging Works

With the openness of the internet, swinging has moved from the underground into more mainstream territory. While swinging clubs and parties have always existed, joining them or asking questions has …

Does Swinging Curb Cheating in Lifestyle Relationships?

In the realm of the swingers lifestyle, there can be several concepts of ‘cheating’ and many swinger couples don’t consider playtime as such. The lifestyle is very different for every couple, but for the sake of this post we’ll define cheating and establish whether or not swinging is a potential curb check for such behavior. … Continue reading Does Swinging Curb Cheating in Lifestyle Relationships?→